I am going to marry Adam Levine’s voice.
…let’s just make that “I am going to marry Adam Levine.”
This makes me want to curl up into a ball, delete Photoshop and break my computer all at the same time.
THAT FACE.
(via atherose)
(Source: grotesquerose, via everythingismeanttobe-broken)
(Source: leilockheart, via everythingismeanttobe-broken)
IT’S MY NEPHEW HE’S VERY DISTURBED
Absolutely dying. Dear god.
(via landofmailandexplosions)
I am going to write a bill for basic human law
After reflecting and realizing that I have been a certifiable basket case today, I came to a conclusion.
Any woman on hormonal medication is allowed at most 3 days to be said certifiable basket case. The exact amount of days used shall depend on necessity of the woman undergoing the process of her uterus attempting to kill her. During this “grace period,” the woman in question is entitled to, but not limited to, the following behaviors:
Acting completely irrational about men, hatred of men, consumption of larger than normal portions of sugar related and containing foods, rapidly changing moods, and the right to moan in agony on the couch for the majority of the day.
Failure to freely allow these rights is punishable by torture and subjection to the woman’s mood swings.
W.I.N
(via landofmailandexplosions)
Excited is an understatement right now. :D
:D
I’d like to refocus everyone’s attention away from the Kardashians and onto Doctors Without Borders or aid workers. Let’s redefine scandal. Scandal is not who so-and-so is dating; scandal is the fact that 1.2 million people are still living in tents in Haiti, and cholera is rampant because Nepalese U.N. soldiers dumped shit from their Porta-Potties into the river. That’s a fucking scandal. If the average 15-year-old was hearing about that instead of so-and-so’s plastic surgery or cheating in Hollywood, I’d feel better about our future.
Olivia Wilde to Marie Claire (via delacours)I knew I was always in love with her.
(Source: damnedifyoudontdamnedifyoudo, via moralitymortality)
Oh my god, you guys, my friend is a douchebag
He just made me watch paranormal activity. For the first time. At 1:30 am.
I think I just died inside a little.
Please, blow up my ask or something. Distract me. Watching battle Los Angeles now.
Hay guys.
Drinking beer. Drunk. Broke up with boyfriend. Futurama is so much funnier with beer.
K bye.
Awkward shit of the day
Had a physical.
Doctor told me I have “a cute little cervix.”
……The fuck.
Snape - “It Gets Better” (x)
Can’t. Stop. Laughing.
“Turn right in 2 miles. Do not disappoint me.”
“How grand it must be to have the luxury of not taking Exit 12. Turn around when possible, you bumbling idiot.”
“How extraordinarily like your father you are; he would have missed the turn-off too. Turn around and go back, you pathetic fool.”
“There will be no foolish lane-merging or silly u-turns in the next mile.”
“Miss the right turn? 20 liters off for your car.”
/somehow dumps gas out of car
“That’s the second time you’ve missed that exit you swine. Are you unable to pay attention or do you simply think you are incapable of making mistakes?”
(Source: wellblainelovesfootball, via atherose)
